Prophet Mohammed (peace be upon him) was once asked advice by a Sahabi (his companion). The former asked the latter not to get angry. The latter asked him for advice again. Once again, the former repeated the same, “Don’t be angry”. And the same process was repeated again, i.e. the former gave the same advice to the latter. You can understand from this how important it is to avoid anger!
Pay attention to your basic needs to avoid anger
Having proper sleep
One of the foremost reasons of anger, especially in today’s age is lack of proper sleep. The best time to sleep is from 10 p.m. to 4 a.m. Make sure you get your proper quota of sleep every day. The majority of advocates vouch for a solid eight hours of sleep at night. But this duration varies from person to person. Some might be able to remain normal even with five to six hours of sleep. Some may require a little more than the normal eight hours. But the best way to achieve this is the age-old/cliched adage, ‘Early to bed and early to rise’.
Always get up at the same time no matter what time you sleep in the night. Have your supper/dinner early preferably right after sunset. And avoid exposure to any sort of electronic media for at least half an hour (30 minutes) before sleep. Lack of proper sleep makes one grumpy and more prone to outbursts of anger. Get up at the same time, preferably before sunrise. Have a protein-rich breakfast within 30 minutes of getting up.
I cannot help but overemphasize the necessity of this. Make sure your basic needs of food, sex, shelter, and other secondary needs are met to the extent possible.
Manage with whatever you have to control anger
Leave the business of today to today itself
Forgive everyone no matter what and also make sure to forget about it. This is easier said than done. One of the greatest mistakes we commit is to load our minds and hearts unnecessarily with useless things, the majority of which are beyond our control. Trust the ALMIGHTY – He is there to take care of all of us. He is running this whole universe. He knows what is best for all of us. And trust me, you won’t leave your worldly abode until you get your total quota of worldly bliss destined for you.
Many of us are unhappy over so many things. While some are not even sure of their meal the next day, some are worried about the excess wealth they have and what they can do about it. Talk about disparities! The greatest joy in this world comes from contentment in whatever one has. Self-contentment is so lacking among us today that if someone starts a course on that, there will be millions or even billions desirous of learning from that.
Uncertainty of the future, fear of poverty force human beings to do unimaginable things, acts of indecency – basically selling their souls to the devil/Satan! Don’t worry. Everything will be taken care of undeniably and for sure. Hope and faith are two mountains which one should never stop depending upon, so goes an old saying.
Plan ahead with whatever you have
You might be having very little money and very few resources. But there are countless examples of entrepreneurs building multi-billion enterprises from scratch. You must have heard of the saying (cliched one again), ‘Adversity brings out the best in a wo/man’. Another thing you have to remember is to plan everything ahead and at least to a semblance of perfection. ‘Plan to fail and fail to plan’. So, planning removes lots of headaches and unnecessary tension and the accompanying anger.
Trust me, everything will work out. According to your plan provided you put in the effort and hard work. And always remember what ALMIGHTY ALLAH says in the Holy Quran, “They plan, and ALLAH plans. Surely, ALLAH is the Best of Planners”.
Pleasing everyone – Invitation to anger
You can never please everyone in your life
Of course, this is impossible. But you can make an effort to do your best without ruffling any feathers or entering the bad books of anyone. Of course, you will always have a few people who won’t like you or try to create trouble for you. Don’t worry. Just leave everything to the ALMIGHTY and time (the ALMIGHTY HIMSELF is time). You can avoid those people who create trouble both online and offline.
Every dog has its day
You are putting in your best efforts, and working hard but success still eludes you. Don’t worry. ‘Every dog has its day’. As I mentioned earlier, what is destined for you will come no matter what. There is a verse in the Holy Quran that states, “If the ALMIGHTY has decreed something good for you, then even if all the forces in the universe unite together to prevent that good from reaching you, they cannot. Similarly, if the ALMIGHTY has decreed something bad for you, then even if all the forces in the universe unite together to prevent that bad from reaching you, they cannot”.
And remember this, the Holy Quran also states that whatever good you get is from the ALMIGHTY and whatever bad you get is from your own hands, i.e., you are responsible!
Spread your legs to fit your blanket
This is a translation of a Hindi saying, ‘Jitni chaadar, Utne paav’. Be thrifty always, no matter whether you are poor, middle class, or even rich. There are numerous examples of people in this world whose whole wealth has been wiped off in a jiffy. So, no matter what, never let your guard down about spending. Always save something for the rainy day. This will save you from getting angry during times of adversity.
Fight life no matter what but control anger
Take up only that much that you can achieve
There is no harm in aiming for the stars, but be realistic. Identify your niche, find out whether that works in the market or not, and then slowly expand. ‘Slow and steady wins the race’.
No matter what, get up, dress for the day, and give it your best
It does not matter whether you have a job or not. Get up, dress as if you are going to a job even if you don’t have one, and do whatever you are good at. Right from your home. There are so many opportunities even online too. Not all of them might be useful or start paying from the word, ‘Go’. But perseverance, hard work, and consistency will pay off.
Be supportive of each other, especially in your immediate family no matter what. Have your meals together. I don’t know whether there is truth in the saying, ‘The family that eats together stays together’. But I am a great advocate of it. Because of all the distractions present in the world today, meal time is one time when family members can bond with each other. And avoid using the phone or watching TV (easier said than done) at least during meals.
Seek help if you still are not able to control anger
Despite doing all the above, what if you are still haunted by the ‘anger’ demon?
Seek medical help if you feel like you are always angry. Your doctor will suggest laboratory investigations if required. Avoid any sort of self-medication, please! Always seek the help of qualified medical personnel. Avoid any sort of medication with side effects. Complementary & Alternative Medicine (CAM), especially Homeopathy is useful for all diseases and free of any side effects.
Also, avoid any sorts of addictions (including smoking), intoxicants, or watching pornography (go in for the good ole sex within the limits of marriage). According to Islam, alcohol is the mother of all evils! Remember ‘wine, woman, and money’. Well, no other wolves have spread destruction among people as much as these three!
Be spiritual. Even if you are an atheist, you can at least appreciate the fact that some superpower is running this entire universe. Otherwise, it would have been helter skelter, trust me. Do meditation for a few minutes every day. Remain active, and use a bicycle instead of depending on vehicles running on petrol or diesel. Hey, and don’t forget your siesta (afternoon nap) every day, no matter what! Besides, it is a Sunnah [the practice of Prophet Mohammed (peace be upon him)] too.