Everyone loves Sex
Of course, right? Who doesn’t love sex? Probably everyone in this universe loves it. But sex like everything else in this life is best if indulged in moderation and in the correct manner. And respecting all the boundaries! What are boundaries, you might ask me?
Well, there lies the crux of the problem. Besides sex, people are becoming heavily dependent upon pornography, and masturbation. It’s as if the three are an intricate troika upon which the human race has become dependent!
Sex like food, water, clothing, and shelter is a basic necessity of life. Then why should there be any boundaries? Apart from clothing; food, water, and sex are also necessary for animals. In case of many animals, both domesticated (more so) and wild, shelter too is required.
So, if sex is necessary for both human beings and animals, why should there be any difference in the performance of the act by both? To be honest, unfortunately, this is becoming very much true and evident.
‘Ubiquitous’ sex
One of the signs of Judgement Day is that sex will be performed openly everywhere in this world. And this sign is already visible – at least on some private and secluded beaches, in parks, public places, zoos, etc. It is as if the human race is screaming at the top of its voice – if the animals can do it openly, why cannot we???
The ‘slimy’ smartphone?
Enter the ubiquitous ‘smartphone’. Sometimes it appears as if the effects of the smartphone are evident from the mother’s womb itself! I mean, a child and maybe even an infant (in a few years probably) can handle the smartphone deftly. A smartphone has become the alter ego of a person.
Or in the cases of married persons, it has become kind of a second spouse – to both the husband and the wife! And people are recording nearly everything. Their entire lives are there online for the whole world and probably the universe to see. And people are devouring the lives of others quenching their ‘voyeuristic’ appetites of ages!
Sex – the most private act is no longer so!
The sexual act, the most private moment of one’s life is wide open for others to see. Many people are doing it for money, some for its sheer ‘kick’, and many others are quenching their ‘narcissistic’ tendencies. It’s probably better to go and live in the jungle. Far away from the madding and the crowd (my apologies to the Late Thomas Hardy) with the deafening noises! But that is not possible, right? So, how do we deal with this menace?
Let’s start with the bare basics – our ‘infinitely’ old (great)^∞grand-parents, Prophet Adam, and his wife, Eve. All of you are probably aware of the first story played out among human beings. Prophet Adam and Eve were living happily in heaven when Satan led them astray.
And subsequently were thrown on this earth of ours! From that time onward, man has been fighting with his fellow-brother over woman, money, and in some cases over wine too! That does not mean the woman is far behind. She too has been fighting with her fellow-sister over several things (besides the ones mentioned above in this paragraph).
Marriage – The Solution
With all due respect to women, why should any woman put herself in any weak situation? Where she is overpowered by force, the lure of money, power, etc. And in many cases, a woman herself is another woman’s enemy. In today’s age where live-in relationships are common, sexual freedom is rampant, is there any role for the institution of marriage? Marriage is required as it is the best solution for many rampant problems. In fact, marriage is half of Sunnah in Islam.
Let me explain. Why can’t human beings perform sex just like animals? Well, in the first place, that is the reason they are called animals and we human beings, right? There are very few animals that are monogamous. And most of them never make any distinction between their siblings, parents, etc. concerning sex. But human beings, leaving aside a misguided minuscule minority, don’t act that way, right?
Promiscuity – The ‘new’ order?
A ‘promiscuous’ culture has permeated the world. And no, this is not an import from the Western culture, as some people mistakenly say. This culture has been prevalent throughout the world for ages. The only thing is that the Western world, especially Hollywood and the Western media (including erotic novels, magazines, books, etc.) has highlighted and magnified this culture out of proportion, that’s all!
The West has several good things it does. For example, time disciple, the dignity of labor, etc. Why not follow these good things? And this applies to human beings too. One should never hate a person per se. His/her actions, behaviors, habits, etc. should be disliked.
Unnecessary ‘side-effects’ of sex
Anyways, coming to our original topic of sex. Let us just forget for a moment all morality and throw it away in the far sea. And continue with our boyfriend-girlfriend culture. Suppose the girl gets pregnant despite taking all precautions.
Yes, mind you, no form of contraception is 100% fool-proof. And let us assume the pregnant girl gives birth to an out-of-wedlock child. For the unwed parents themselves, this might not be easy. But for the child born that way, his/her life will be very difficult – literally hell! The child bears the stigma for life for no fault of his/her.
Now, coming to married people. Even these people are not immune to the vagaries of time. Swinging, polyamory, and what not? Some do it out of sheer boredom, some to climb up the corporate ladder, some for money, and umpteen other stupid reasons.
Unlimited money, luxurious lifestyle, alcohol and drugs, and several other factors are making for a heady mix! People are lost. And this is giving rise to heinous crimes like rape, human trafficking, and slavery (yes, this exists even today – of course, not in its ancient form but ‘modern’ form/s). Not to mention the ever-increasing number of sexually transmitted diseases (STDs)!
Masturbation – Easy way out?
Masturbation – performed more by unmarried persons and in a few cases by married people too. Can it be called self-abuse? Yes, probably so, at least to some extent. Sometimes, I am worried if human beings will forget sex. Like a big cat forgetting hunting. Possible?
Definitely so, looking at the pace at which humanity is making strides. In many cases, masturbation usually starts among adolescents due to peer influence. What starts as innocent play – watching ‘blue’ films, reading ‘extra-erotic’ literature, not to forget the hell-loads of pornography prevalent on the internet – soon turns out to be a full-fledged ‘hand and private parts’ game!
Social Evils
Contrary to popular opinion, homosexuality, incest, etc. are very prevalent where the boyfriend-girlfriend culture is not present. Or the boys and girls maintain the required distance from each other due to their conservative background, upbringing, etc.
Probably, early marriage is the best solution. Of course, after both, the boys and girls attain the legal age of marriage. I have seen several successful marriages even in the USA where the couples had married at a very young age. At least, the couples won’t have a chance to stray wildly in their sexual endeavors. They would be content with each other in their love.
Divorce – the most hated thing
Sex, as I had mentioned at the beginning of this article is an absolute necessity just like food, shelter, etc. But the means of attaining sex should be fair and decent. In many cases, even after marriage, the ‘roving’ eyes of men (mostly) and women too (of late) have led to chaos, discord, and divorce!
Divorce, which is the most hated in the sight of ALLAH is becoming very common among all communities (nearly 50% and in no way inferior to the high rates in the Western world!). The rates are nearly similar throughout the world. But this is not a one-day consequence.
The man strays online and even offline and the woman is not far behind. And one day, the marriage falls apart. If the husband and wife are happy with each other and listen to each other, the world would be a better and happy place!
Come what may, whether it be kids, other family members (which is usually very rare in today’s age of ‘ultra-nuclear’ families), colleagues in the workplace, etc., if the husband and wife are on the same wavelength regarding sex, they will be very happy.
Pornography – ‘kitsch’ industry?
Pornography is a huge and burgeoning industry worldwide so much so that it has become somewhat like a mainstream entertainment industry! What is the secret behind the success of pornography? Human beings, just like all the other good things in life, are obsessed with falsehood and false things in life.
Come what may, if the husband and wife pay attention to sex in their marriage, the marriage will last a lifetime. And the concerned parties involved with the husband and wife, especially children will be saved from the vagaries of divorce and the accompanying destruction in the lives of everyone involved. In many cases, the husband and wife get addicted to pornography if either of them is not giving attention to each other.
Come on, get real before it’s too late!!!
It’s as if pornography becomes the easy way around to get around real sex. Pornography and masturbation become inextricably linked in people’s lives. Shunning the false things and getting onto the ‘bandwagon’ of ‘real’ sex will be probably the first thing among several things that need to get corrected. In today’s world of falsehood PERIOD Making time for each other, come what may, whenever and however, should be the ‘mantra’ for sexual success and longevity! Give ‘real’ sex a chance. After all, that’s how we all arrived here albeit for a short, ‘mortal’ while in this artificial world of ours!